Pegging the Patriarchy

So it turns out pegging the patriarchy isn’t just a metaphorical feminist daydream. It’s an actual motto – and a reminder that the patriarchy can be taken down with a dildo, if nothing else.

Picture Luna Matatas (a fierce queer sex educator) coining the phrase in 2015, then Cara Delevingne famously striding into the Met Gala wearing a white Dior bulletproof vest screaming “Peg the Patriarchy.” Instant chaos. Cara Delevingne wore that vest (designed by Dior) with matching trousers, turning the gag into a centerpiece of the night.

What is Pegging the Patriarchy?

In plain terms, Peg the Patriarchy is Luna Matatas’s trademarked slogan (patented in Canada in 2018) meant to flip the script on gender power. It’s about empowerment and women’s equality, not a literal sex lesson. (pegging is an anal sex act where one partner straps on a dildo and penetrates the other). But Luna’s catchphrase wasn’t about actual hot butt action – it was a metaphor for tossing out the system that “requires subservience within a gender binary.”

Luna Matatas even built a queer-owned small business around that saying. She sells Peg the Patriarchy t-shirts, mugs, and more on her official shop. The whole idea is to challenge traditional gender roles in bed and beyond. It’s literally a slogan about flip-the-script, about asking “Who decides the gender roles now?” Peg the patriarchy, in Luna’s dictionary, means “stick it to the man” in reverse. The phrase turned an anal sex act into a political punchline.

Cara Delevingne and the Met Gala Hijack

Then came the moment: Cara Delevingne wore that slogan on her Met Gala outfit. Cue Twitter meltdown. Luna Matatas had zero warning. She was “initially excited” to see her phrase trending – until she realized nobody was tagging her name or her business. What a facepalm. A skinny white model was being hailed for women empowerment with a bulletproof vest as her megaphone. Luna pointed out: “A white, thin, cis body just co-opted my catchphrase without credit.”

It smacked of classic white feminism. A Medium journalist even wrote that a “white, English womanstole the work of a person of colour”. Cara was getting all the credit, while Luna the creator was invisible. Luna quipped, “Sound familiar?” – as in, just another day of the patriarchy at play.

For perspective: Luna is a fat, queer sex educator building her small biz one t-shirt at a time. Cara is a rich, famous model. Guess whose story ends up in Vogue? (Answer: Cara’s, with slick headlines about “sticking it to the man”.) The mainstream loved “Stick it to the man!” and called it women’s empowerment, while Luna was literally roasting popcorn in the background.

In short, one dior-clad model appropriated a slogan from a Black femme entrepreneur. Luna used it to highlight how privilege works. She told Insider that as a fat, fat body and a racialized person, she already faces barriers, so watching Cara parade that vest without a thank-you was a “slap in the face”. The media and white women celebrated Cara’s stunt, framing it as empowerment, while Luna was doing actual protest work.

Patriarchy in the Bedroom

So what is the patriarchy doing under the sheets? Usually, it means the man sets the scene – he picks positions, the tempo, and whose orgasm is the priority. Sex tips in glossy mags often boil down to “be sexy for him.” Even the advice “women should try being dominant” often translates to “be the kind of dominant he expects”. In other words, old traditional gender roles say his pleasure first.

Pegging throws a wrench in that. Suddenly, the strap-on wielding partner is “in charge.” Critics immediately complained – some even called pegging “inherently demeaning” to men or said it’s as if the patriarchy is “getting an orgasm.” Others joked it sounds like patriarchy itself is “effeminate” now. Luna Matatas was like, “What? It’s just a consensual sexual act, not a feminist execution!”

 

[Bedroom Power Dynamic Infographic]

We conducted a poll on our Instagram to see who should call the shots in the bedroom. The verdict? Well, let’s just say the patriarchy got thoroughly spanked. Seems like folks are ready to toss out those outdated roles and share the reins equally.

 

 

Pegging the Script: Rewriting Power Between the Sheets

In practice, patriarchy in bed is all about scripted roles. If we follow the old playbook, “man → top; woman → bottom.” Peg the Patriarchy means rewriting that script. It’s basically a reversal dance: the bottom now grins. Some folks on Reddit and Twitter asked if men would feel emasculated, but sex educators shrug: a hole is a hole, patriarchy is the victim. As one critic quipped (courtesy of a sex blog), pegging’s emergence basically means “the patriarchy is getting turned on.”

Crucially, this talk isn’t just kink. It’s about who holds sexual power. The patriarchy says “Be the submissive partner.” Luna’s catchphrase said, “No way, I’ll be the dominant one.” It’s a mini-revolution. And it means actual sex acts, actual strap on dildo fun, become political statements. If patriarchy in bed means “dude decides everything,” then pegging is the counter-move: “Nope, switcheroo.” It’s about making bedroom dynamics egalitarian – if one partner is sexually penetrated, it’s just another act on the menu, not a hierarchical judgment.

Saffron Silicone Pegging Kit – Black/Red

“Slay the Patriarchy”: Swords or Strap-ons?

You’ve definitely heard “slay the patriarchy.” That one is basically feminist shorthand for “kill those outdated power structures.”

“Peg the patriarchy,” on the other hand, is the kinkier cousin of that meme. It’s the difference between saying “I’ll chop patriarchy with my axe” and saying “I’ll fuck patriarchy with a strap-on.” Both slogans share a vibe: patriarchy is a joke, and we’re not following its rules.

Slay is the safe mainstream version. It’s on hats and hoodies. Peg is the spicy, NSFW version — guaranteed to make conservative bros choke on their bourbon. When Cara said it was about “gender equality… stick it to the man”, she basically sanitized the kink. Meanwhile, the sex press and comedians were more interested in the how.

Either way, both cries aim to puncture power. One is more family-friendly, one requires HBO late-night access. Yet both remind us patriarchy doesn’t disappear when the camera’s off.

Six Flavors of Patriarchy

If you think patriarchy is just an old men’s club, think again. It has dozens of forms. Here are six types of patriarchy that still nag us today:

• Family Patriarchy:

  Dad’s the boss. “Because I said so” is our childhood anthem. Guy runs the household, decides who dates whom, who cleans dishes, and everyone tiptoes. Think 1950s dad with the newspaper.

• Corporate Patriarchy:

  Boardrooms and offices where men hold the top jobs. Women still have to hustle twice as hard for half the credit.

• Religious/State Patriarchy:

  Laws or holy books saying “women can’t speak in church” or “you need a male guardian.” Clerical suits + politicians making rules about your body, marriage, jobs – classic patriarchy.

• Media/Pop Culture Patriarchy:

  Every movie has a damsel in distress, and every ad tells women to smile more for men. Even the “female empowerment” headlines can be twisted if they only celebrate a certain kind of woman.

• White Feminist Patriarchy:

  Let’s not ignore this one. It’s when well-meaning rallies and slogans get co-opted and filtered through a narrow lens. Celebs stand on the same stage, but only some voices get microphones. It’s patriarchy wearing a pussy hat – if you forget intersectionality.

• Internalized Patriarchy:

  Surprise, it lives in our brains. “Don’t be too loud,” “Not like other girls,” “You should smile” – these nagging thoughts are patriarchy whispering sweet nonsense. When women police each other’s choices (from fashion to sex), that’s patriarchy playing puppet-master inside the head.

And the best part? Every single one of these flavors of patriarchy can get spread apart and fucked, quite literally and symbolically—with a strap-on. Pegging isn’t just a bedroom act; it’s a statement. A reversal. A reckoning. Whether you’re roleplaying dominance, reclaiming power, or just feeling cheeky, pegging becomes a bold way to say, “I see your rules—and I’m not just breaking them, I’m bending them over.” From internalized shame to outdated gender scripts, each type of patriarchy makes a great target for a little role reversal.

Booty Shorts Harness with 6″ Dildo – Small

Pegging the Patriarchy (and Everything Else)

All of these hide under the same tent. Pegging the patriarchy, slaying or not, is essentially about spiking all those soft patriarchal subcultures. No matter the setting – from your bedroom to the billboards – patriarchy’s got forms of itself.

We’ve jumped from strap-ons to slogans, from Vogue interviews to protest signs. If anything’s clear, it’s that patriarchy shows up everywhere, even between the sheets. Peg the Patriarchy might sound like a joke, but it opened real conversations – sex-positive, feminist ones, about who’s in charge. We’re not going to tie this up neatly. We’re still left with questions: which rules do we keep, which do we break? Who really leads the dance when the lights go out?

One thing’s for sure: patriarchy isn’t going to retire quietly. So maybe we’ll keep chanting. Maybe we’ll keep pegging its assumptions, one post—and one strap-on—at a time. If you’re ready to take control or just curious where rebellion meets pleasure, check out the strap-ons, harnesses, and other tools of delightful defiance at JackandJillAdult.com. The patriarchy might not have the last laugh… or maybe it will, if Cara lands a music deal titled “Slay the Patriarchy.” Who knows? The revolution’s weird like that, and it’s not over yet.